Who's Your Daddy??

By: Cynthia Litman
 
Pearl of the Post: Makings of a Father

In the beginning

As we celebrate Father's Day I'm polishing this pearl ~ the origins of your journey begins long long ago, multiple generations away with Father time.

We may only know the names and faces of the fathers of a few generations back yet the line of me consist of an army of fathers. 

Those in our paternal timeline brought fathers together in a brotherhood which advanced humanity forward in all ways everyday.

The role of Father begins in the literal sense and encompasses the general sense, from our baby's daddy to our Founding Fathers, Coaches, Mentors and any societal leader or person who exhibits a paternal side towards another person, place or thing.

Naturally when I think of my father, a montage plays out in my mind of memories and feelings at every life stage of being a daddy's girl.

Memories of being cared for as an infant, coached as a tomboy, advised as an adolescent, tolerated as a teenager, prayed for as a college student, respected as a law student, celebrated as a wife and guided as a mother.

Feelings of comfort from his hugs and loving presence, sadness from any moment of disappointment, pride in being his daughter (and vice versa), grateful for all he's provided, tears wiped from my eyes from the many times I've cried on his broad shoulders, protected in moments of vulnerability and joy from the laughter, lots of it, we've shared.


He's adapted to every role we've played out and now he's a grandfather passing up the life ladder looking upon his grandchildren with love and adoration.

Father time passes the torch in these moments. I see his father standing behind him, whom I was lucky enough to build a rainbow of memories with. I see my great-grandfather whom I've only heard stories about.

I imagine the faces, characters and life stories of the fathers before. 

I branch to see my maternal grandfather and his story of survival, appreciation of life, the loss of many would be fathers and the strength of the genes which flow through his line unto mine.

The Making Of A Father

As I trail backwards, I see forward.

My son and daughter, the present product of their father, and their father's fathers line.  I see them embody the many sides of our family line and wonder how they'll fair the tests of time.

They hold the keys to carrying the line forward into the future. I wonder the kind of father my son will be, if he'll be. (I wanna be a very Jewish Grandma in this lifetime)  If he'll embrace the role or if he'll recoil from it. If it'll bring out the best or the worst in him and how he'll evolve.

Many feel an absence of the father figure. A father left the family, destroyed trust or worked unending hours. My father worked from before sunrise to well after sundown and I missed him terribly during the day. Any time he showed up for a volleyball game or some activity of mine was "special" and meant enough for me to remember to share it.

Part Grandpa/Part Santa

It's always about the quality of time shared. You can be present every minute but be completely absent from the moment. Showing up is the first step, the space you hold is everything. 

For those who's had to find the father in their mothers, uncles or elsewhere, it's a beautiful thing to step back and to simply thank the seed which was planted for you to thrive.

A father is made up of so much more than having children. A father's touch forever imprints the heart, mind and soul of others.

Happy Father's Day!!

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